* Though initially glamorous, life in the mob usually results in a prison term or death.
* Babysitters are unreliable drug mules.
* You can have an extramarital affair with no consequences.
* Whenever a murder victim is discovered, the piano coda from "Layla" plays.
* Never disrespect Joe Pesci.
* Ray Liotta is an ideal candidate if you ever need someone to narrate your life.
* Jewish women are difficult in relationships.
* Cocaine is bad for your health, though dealing it is good for your wallet.
* Loyalty to your friends is important, unless they are about to kill you.
* It is relatively easy to commit, and get away with, large scale robberies.
* As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster.