* I just could not wait to show you how meta and self-reflexive I am.
* The shoddy ghostwriter I've hired, since I'm too famous and wealthy to do this blog on my own, can't stick to a schedule.
* I'm going to be out of town for the long weekend and will not have Internet access.
* I just don't give a damn.
* The blog is switching to updating every three days instead of every five.
* Due to a recent drug and booze binge of staggering proportions, I believe it is actually Friday today.