Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Reasons women shouldn't be allowed to vote

* Poor decision-making skills
* Already have enough responsibility from raising children, cooking, doing laundry, etc.
* Inherent irrationality
* They're not people
* Muslims don't let their women vote, and they seem to be doing just fine
* Makes every man's vote worth twice as much, so would probably increase voter turnout

Friday, February 19, 2010

Reasons all the lists this month are explanatory

* Coincidence, until now
* Never done a theme month before
* Everyone is too confused, needs me to clear things up
* It is the new, permanent format of the blog
* Popular demand
* Because you're stupid

Monday, February 15, 2010

Guest list by Deep Throat: Top ten reasons you are a virgin at 20

1. Fat
2. Ugly
3. Only enjoy platonic love
4. Voluntarily attend church on a weekly basis
5. Play card games with no risk or monetary reward
6. Live in your parents' basement
7. You are simply confused by sex
8. You have soft hands
9. Do not speak the local language
10. Botched circumsion at birth

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Reasons I don't vote in student body elections

* My vote doesn't make a difference
* As a Canadian, I'm not legally allowed to participate in American democractic processes
* Unaware an election was occuring
* Republicans conspire to invalidate my vote
* I'm a felon
* None of the candidates represented my interests
* Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Reasons I'm un-punk

* In business school
* Can't grow a beard
* Eat meat
* No tattoos or piercings
* Don't listen to much 'Orgcore
* Libertarian
* Like ZZ Top