Friday, December 9, 2011

Urban legends about the NFL I'm hoping to start

  • Tony Dungy is Nosferatu
  • Tom Brady and Wes Welker are secretly a couple. The Patriots locker room refers to the QB-WR tandem as "the Rainbow Connection"
  • Cam Newton only agreed to play for the Panthers after their management assured his father he would get "pay for play"
  • Rex Ryan eats a player on the Jets who underperforms in training camp every summer
  • Roger Goodell was the basis for the Daniel Plainview character in "There Will Be Blood"
  • Tim Tebow sold his soul for the Broncos starting job. Their recent success is thanks to Satan rather than God
  • The failure of the 2011 Eagles is entirely due to strife in the locker room centered around Asante Samuel's support for Israel and Brent Celek's support for Palestine
  • The Jaguars only drafted Blaine Gabbert because of his hair
  • John Madden flies all the time

No comments: